Fear

Manifests in stomachaches, forgetfulness, loose stools. I like to wear ballerina skirts, smear my face with glitter. I grow my hair as if beauty was the antidote. Beauty is a scam. I sometimes think I'm tougher than I am. I'm a shit talker, afraid of my dog. I've done horrific things. I used to be a cutter. I spit in my brother's face. My friend once told me, be nice to yourself. I wish I could listen. See how quickly my anger turns inward? My cells wear boxing gloves. Now that Trump is president there's increased danger of a nuclear holocaust. Remember how Bush used to say nucular? We love our ignorance. We think it makes us real. When I say we, I mean America.

(appeared in The Recluse, issue 13)